


Flurry

by grimsgay



Category: Magi: The Labyrinth of Magic
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Djinn Equip, Fever, M/M, Serious Injuries, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-10-02 13:48:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17265311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grimsgay/pseuds/grimsgay
Summary: He sees Judar immediately, which brings him some slight relief. The magician is curled up in a corner, most likely asleep, with a heavy robe draped over him. With soft eyes, Hakuryuu steps closer. He murmurs Judar’s name, but when he gets no reply, he frowns. That’s when he notices--Judar isn’t breathing.Fuck.******Part of the JuHaku New Years exchange! My giftee wanted Hakuryuu making use of Belial’s four arms and what happened when Hakuryuu went to seek Judar out in his hometown!





	Flurry

It hasn’t been long. It really hasn’t... Hakuryuu does his best to convince himself that Judar’s lack of contact is nothing to bat an eye at. He buries himself in his work, which isn’t hard, given how much there is to do at any given point. 

Yet, even then, his mind drifts. He thinks of Judar, and he thinks of Tenka.

Judar had wanted to find peace within himself- to visit his hometown, seek out any remaining family, and reconcile with his lost past. Though Hakuryuu has missed him dearly, he has not made any attempt to interrupt this self journey. It’s something Judar must experience on his own.

Despite the distance, the magician has sent him daily signs of life. It’s nothing much- no words are ever sent, just small bursts of magic, often in the shape of dragons, or butterflies, or explosions of ice or flowers... It’s not much, but Hakuryuu knows it’s him. He’s pacified by these daily reminders that things are fine, and he knows that Judar is thinking of him.   
  
On the first missed day, Hakuryuu brushes it off. There are many reasons he may not have sent notice- He may have gone to bed early, or gotten drunk, or simply so tied up in family business that he forgot- But one day becomes two, three brings mild concern, and by the end of day four, Hakuryuu knows something is wrong.   
  
Judar, for all his stubbornness and inability to properly express his emotions, is not one to simply ghost someone dear to him.

It doesn’t take him long to prepare; thanks to Kou’s mages he’s able to pack light and travel quickly via magic portals. The downside, of course, is that his arrival remains unexpected. His clothing has been carefully chosen to keep him warm, but standing out in the harsh weather is never fun.

The villagers don’t turn him away, but they’re not particularly helpful. They haven’t seen Judar in several days, since around when Hakuryuu last received contact from him. They can do nothing more but point him in the direction they suspect he traveled, and the rest is up to Hakuryuu.

He wanders through the snowy landscape for what feels like hours. It’s frigid, so much so that each breath is wholly visible. In his childhood, he’d once despised the cold and how it always seemed to settle in his core and bones during winter. After the fire, however, it became a comfort. It was the contrast, he mused. If he could feel the ice and snow, he couldn’t feel the whispers and memories of flames tearing into his skin. 

Then, there had been Judar. The magi has come into his life as a blizzard, and over time, he’d begun to embrace the ice as an extension of himself. Judar was his magi; his companion, his partner, and his best friend- Any ice he made was a solace. 

Now… Even though Hakuryuu should find the cold contrastingly warming on his mind, he feels numb. There is no comfort in knowing Judar could be injured. 

_ Or dead. _

He doesn’t want to think that darkly. 

Eventually, he comes across a cave. At first he nearly misses it, but the faint glow of a blue flame draws him in. Immediately, Hakuryuu knows that Judar resides inside. The former magi has never been particularly skilled with fire magic; while he can now safely cast a flame, he still cannot hold one without the color eventually fading to blue. It’s the mark of an ice magician, through and through. Slowly, Hakuryuu approaches.

The inside of the cave is warm, almost feverishly so. Hakuryuu is uncomfortable stepping inside, but given the horrendous state of the weather, he muses that being a bit warm is preferable. At the very least, he knows Judar hasn’t frozen to death. 

He sees Judar immediately, which brings him some slight relief. The magician is curled up in a corner, most likely asleep, with a heavy robe draped over him. With soft eyes, Hakuryuu steps closer. He murmurs Judar’s name, but when he gets no reply, he frowns. That’s when he notices- 

-Judar isn’t breathing. 

Fuck.

Panic sets in, and he moves instantly to Judar’s side. He gently flips the older man over, wraps an arm around him, and feels for a pulse. Upon closer inspection, he finds a faint stream of breath, but it’s uneven, patchy. He’s not sure how much longer Judar will keep it going, either. That thought terrifies him.

Judar may not always have been a great person. He’s problematic, he can be whiny, he’s been called ungrateful, mean, dishonest, and a multitude of other negative words that Hakuryuu does not care to repeat. Yet despite all that, he’s never been cruel to Hakuryuu. In fact, he’s only ever been wonderful to the young prince. 

There have been countless nights where Hakuryuu is unable to speak on the demons trapped in his mind- Judar always seems to just  _ know- _ he does not try to force a conversation where one is unwanted or unneeded, and instead simply wraps his arms around Hakuryuu and twines them together, until everything melts away.

That’s how their relationship has always been. While others would look at the magician and see something less than human, he’s shown Hakuryuu his true understanding and empathy. His humanity.

Hakuryuu finds it absolutely beautiful. 

This is not.

He’s seen Judar show weakness before, seen him manic and upset and explosive- but this is different. There’s barely any life to his flesh, barely any breath in his lungs, and were it not for the magic permeating the room and keeping the temperature going, Hakuryuu might have guessed him on his deathbed. 

It aches to see him so fragile, without the usual menace and fire in his face. However, Hakuryuu won’t focus on that right now. He  _ can’t _ . He’s lost too much in his life, if he allows himself to lose  _ Judar-  _ he’ll never be able to forgive himself.

Brows furrowing together, Hakuryuu gently pushes a wet strand of hair away from Judar’s face. When he makes contact with the magician’s flesh, flinches. Fuck… Judar is  _ burning. _

He’d like to believe it’s because of the warmth in the cave, but he knows that’s not the case. It’s not warm enough to make someone  _ feverish _ , let alone someone capable of adjusting the temperature of his spell at will- frantically, he begins to remove the heavy clothing that clings to Judar’s form. He needs to be cooled down, preferably  _ fast,  _ although sans dumping him into the blizzard outside, Hakuryuu lacks ideas on how.

Judar stirs then, cracking his eyes blearily up at Hakuryuu and trying to press closer. “...Ryuu? ‘S that you…?” He’s mumbling, hardly coherent, which is reasonable given the temperature of his flesh. “Guess m’mind’s playin tricks’n me again… hahaha…”

Hakuryuu briefly wonders how long he’s been like this. Was it since he went missing? Did he develop the fever sometime after? Either way, Judar is in a bad state.

Hakuryuu whispers, “shhh… Don’t talk too much, moron.” He sighs. He needs to get Judar back to Tenka, quickly- But he also doesn’t want to aggravate his illness too much. “How long have you been feeling bad, Ju?”

Judar hisses, trying to roll closer to Hakuryuu’s form. “Dunno- Tried freezin th’wound. Felt nice n’cold…”

... _ Freezing the wound? _

Hakuryuu moves then, actions explosive as he looks Judar over more thoroughly. Just as he’d said, there is a jagged gash in the side of his robes, blood no longer spilling out, but rather instead replaced by thin threads of frost. The stains blend into the dark tones of the fabrics, but they’re definitely there.

... _ What? _

What the fuck had happened?

Guilt hits him, then, hard and heavy. He should have noticed- of course Judar wouldn’t be on his own in a fucking cave if he were  _ actually  _ ill. He’s stubborn and whiny, but he’d refuse to leave his bed if he so much as caught a sniffle. 

Infection, though… He must have gotten injured during his trip out of the village. Hakuryuu isn’t sure when it became infected, but knowing Judar’s solution was apparently to try and  _ freeze _ the fucking wound, he isn’t surprised. No… he’s not surprised, but he’s still incredibly concerned. 

People die from infected injuries far too often.

“Judar, when you’re better, we are talking about this. But right now…” He swallows heavily, setting Judar gently down as he channels his Djinn with absolute focus.

It takes him a moment to fully equip given how long it’s been since he last used Belial, but soon he feels power flood his bloodstream. In this form, he can’t feel the cold at all- only the underlying strength and boosted physicality of his partner’s magic. Like this, he can carry Judar back much faster. He can save him.

“I’m going to take you back to Tenka,” Hakuryuu says, carefully pulling the feverish magician into his four strong arms. 

Judar clearly hasn’t processed the change in appearance, because he just nods and lets his head loll listlessly against Hakuryuu’s chest. He coughs once, weak and raspy, a small dribble of blood trailing at the edge of his lip. Fuck… Just how extensive is the damage? 

Hakuryuu doesn’t let himself linger on the dread, however. No. He won’t. He needs to get Judar to safety-  _ to a healer _ .

He leaves the cave quickly, the strength of his Djinn allowing him to leap great distances and float over the land. All the while he clings securely to his friend. He cannot bear the thought of dropping him- Not when they’re so close… It still takes longer than he’d like to get back, but they’ve saved hours, he knows. 

When he finally sets Judar down into the care of his relatives, Hakuryuu collapses, Belial’s features immediately fading from his form. 

The rest of his day goes by in a blur. there’s shouting, rustling, running- people move about the village with more urgency than Hakuryuu can process. He feels drained and empty, both from the strain of maintaining Belial’s equip for so long, and the cold, piercing dread that came with nearly losing Judar.

Again.

He leaves Judar in the care of his relatives, unsure what else he can do but attempt sleeping off his anxieties. 

 

*********

 

Hakuryuu returns to his side, later, holding a bowl of something bland looking in one hand, and a peach in the other. Judar wrinkles his nose at the bowl, but there’s a visible vibrancy in his eyes as he notices the fruit. Hakuryuu is relieved to see more color on his face and light in his irises, though he’s still nervous. He’s nearly lost Judar twice now-

Ahh. 

No.

He won’t focus on that. It’s not his fault, nor is it Judar’s. Circumstances have not been kind to either of them, but that doesn’t mean he needs to guilt over it all.

Judar breaks the silence first, glancing from the small bowl, to Hakuryuu, and back again. “What is that?”

“It’s congee.” 

“...Does it have veggies in it?” Of course Judar would be concerned about eating a vegetable. Hakuryuu scoffs. If he’d been anxious at all before, he isn’t now. The fact that Judar is alive enough to complain about vegetables sets his heart at ease.

“It doesn’t.” He means it. Sometimes he’ll attempt to sneak more healthy foods into meals that Judar deems acceptable, but this time he hasn’t. The congee is a simple one, made just from rice and chicken stock. He will not manipulate Judar’s eating habits so soon after another near loss… Ahh. There he goes again. “You can eat the peach after you have some, if you want. Congee first. You need actual food if you’re to recover.”

The magician nods, and Hakuryuu hands the bowl over, watching intently as he takes a first bite. Judar doesn’t seem to love it, but he doesn’t look any more nauseated or hesitant about the food either, which Hakuryuu counts as a win. He needs to eat. As long as he eats, things are fine.

They aren’t, though, and there’s an underlying tension hanging over the room. Even when Judar finishes his food and hands back the empty bowl, even when Hakuryuu passes him the peach, and even when Judar takes a first bite and his eyes roll back in bliss- there’s tension, thick and heavy, and nothing will cut or unravel it except the dreaded conversation that Hakuryuu has been putting off.

Biting his lip, he murmurs, “Judar… what happened?”

Judar blinks at him, pausing in his dessert. The way he’s eating the peach, slurping and sucking up the juice, and occasionally licking a stray droplet from his fingertips, might be erotic, if not for the overwhelming atmosphere. 

“My aunt and uncle needed some herbs that only grow up in the mountains beyond Tenka- traditional medicine you know… I offered to go since I can use magic… the weather was bad, but I can keep myself warm well enough.”

Hakuryuu nods, torn between feeling proud over Judar’s apparent selflessness, and upset over how risky the behavior was.

“Anyway, the weather got worse, and I didn’t see where I was going, and I kinda tripped and fell and-“

“Judar.” 

“...I did what I could… I thought I could wait out the weather and then send for help after, but then it… got infected.”

There’s silence after that, painful and loud, and absolutely overflowing with the chaos of screams. He wants to shout, to cry, to say  _ something-  _ but all he can do is stare at the floor as his limbs shake with emotion. 

Judar has never had a strong sense of self preservation, at least not when it comes to things he deems non fatal. He will do everything he can to avoid death, but if he thinks he can survive something, he would much sooner suffer silently than reach out for help.

He’s always been like that, even before he-

“You could have died.”

‘You did die,’ is what he almost says, but he refrains, bites his tongue. This isn’t the time or place, he tells himself. 

Judar looks away from him. It’s  the first time in awhile that the magician refuses to meet his eyes, and while Hakuryuu himself isn’t exactly eager for the contact, it  _ stings _ . Judar’s avoidance is a chipped, rusted blade, coated in poison and shoved deep into the most sensitive areas of his soul. It’s a rejection, plain and simple.

“You could have died,” he repeats, voice shaky, and then it occurs to him- “...You wanted to-“

“Hey, hey! Hakuryuu! No need to get all morbid- I’m alive after all, aren’t I?” Judar interrupts him then, forcing a smile and a laugh and finally meeting his eyes again- Only, Hakuryuu does not see any of his usual mischief or vibrancy. He sees a broken and wounded animal. He sees  _ fear.  _

_ In that moment, he knows he’s hit the nail directly on its head. _

“ _ Judar, _ ” he hisses, “ _ why? _ ”

There is a moment, louder than thunder, where neither of them speaks. Hakuryuu can’t bring himself to, and Judar has no answer. It’s the most painful quiet Hakuryuu has ever experienced, worse even than the void of Judar’s absence for all those years. 

But it does break, eventually. Judar raises a shaky hand to his bangs and scrunches his eyes tight. “You should  _ know _ why. I don’t  _ belong _ .” 

“...Wha-“

“I don’t fucking belong… Not here, not in Kou, not… Not anywhere.”

“I want you here-“

“But it isn’t the same, is it? You’re different. You’re not emperor anymore, and I’m not your magi, but you’re still royalty. You’re still important. You have your job, your family, a nice little place cut out of society-“ He sneers. “I’m just a magician with the world’s worst reputation, who does nothing but drag the people I care about down.”

Is that… really what Judar thinks? A thousand needle emotions settle into his skin. Each pinprick is different- there’s shame, guilt, pity, pain- none of it is good. He wants to wrap his arms around the magician and hold him close, to stroke his hair and tell him he’s loved, but he doesn’t want to infringe on his personal space in such a fragile moment.

So he asks.

“Judar… Can I hold you?” 

Judar glances up, clearly surprised. His eyes are wet and glossy, and it occurs to Hakuryuu that this might be the first time he’s ever seen Judar cry. Judar gives a hesitant nod, and it’s all the approval Hakuryuu needs before he’s pulling the injured magician into a warm embrace.

Judar sobs against him, ugly and choked and full of emotion, and Hakuryuu clings pathetically to his figure as he holds back his own tears.

“Judar,” he hisses. “You are loved… You belong in Kou, with the people who love and care for you… With Kougyoku, and- And with me.” 

Judar continues to cry, but does not speak, so Hakuryuu continues. “You’re so important to me- I’ve lost you already, I can’t… Please don’t make me go through that again.”

He’s crying now too. He can tell by how hard he clings, by how incoherent his words are growing, and by the dampness that grows on the edge of his cheeks. “I don’t want to be alone.”

“I’m sorry…” 

They stay like that for what feels like an eternity, silently holding and supporting each other in their frail states of mind. Hakuryuu, used to complete stoicism, stops crying first, but he continues to embrace the magician, fingers gliding through sweat damp hair. He grounds himself in the tactility of it all, knowing full well that the texture of hair is not something easily fabricated in his dreams. Judar is real. Judar is with him. Things will be okay.

Judar lets out a shaky sigh when his own tears part, and he nuzzles further into Hakuryuu’s chest. “I’m sorry,” he repeats. “I really am sorry…”

“I know.”

“I don’t want you to worry…”

“I know.”

“I love you…”

Hakuryuu tenses at that, and immediately regrets it when he feels Judar shift uncomfortable in his grasp. “I… love you too.” 

But… there’s always a but, isn’t there…

“...I love you, Judar. I really do, but I can’t… I want things to go right.”

Judar sighs, nodding in understanding. “Yes.”

“...I can’t have a lover who puts so little value on his life and willingly throws himself into such dangerous situations.”

“L… Lover?” Judar chokes.

“Judar,” Hakuryuu says, voice firm. “When you’re ready, I wish to court you. For real. But before any of that, before we can even hold a conversation about the possibility… I need you to promise me this won’t happen again.”

“...I- Yes…” Judar nervously licks his lips, but agrees. “I promise. I’ll do my best to… Yeah.” 

Hearing his promise, Hakuryuu is pacified for the moment. It’s hard to say whether or not Judar will act in pursuit of his promise- the magician has always been volatile- he doesn’t  _ try  _ to break his promises, but there’s no way to say for sure what the future holds.

In the moment, however, Judar speaks with one hundred percent certainty in his words. He means what he says - that he wants to try - and that’s what matters. Hakuryuu has faith in his magician.

“Okay,” is all he says, and he means it. Things  _ will _ be okay, because he trusts in the bond and the words built between them. If Judar tells him something personal, he will believe it with all his heart and soul, because he has no reason to doubt a man whose loyalty has always been pointed on him. 

Eventually, Judar calms down enough to fall into a shaky slumber. It’s relieving that he’s able to get some more rest. His fever may have broken, but he’s still recovering, and likely exhausted from the emotional expulsion they just shared. Hakuryuu does not try to set him back down, instead choosing to recline his own body so that they are both relaxed and embracing on the bedroll. 

As he closes his eyes and opens his mind to dreams, sighs. He doesn’t know what the future will hold, but as long as Judar is there with him, he feels he can handle anything.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy this!!! I’ve been sitting here contemplating titles for at least an hour and feel like a fool- but I’m quite pleased with how this turned out!


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